Are you ready for our ‘engagement lap’ precious?”“No, but I won’t feel any more ready later so if we have done all the risky stuff can I put my green dress on for the lap and have just three or four minutes face time? Then you can lead on flower.” Jenny disappears into the van and is back out in a very short time. I know I’ve said it time and time again but she.........“Ok treasure, I just need to lock the car and van, then we can go but we will need to be wary of ‘have one with us before you go’. I open a can of hobgoblin, and fill Jenny’s half pint tankard from it, Jenny takes her tankard from me and I keep the can.“I will just pretend to drink from the can, you may of course drink what you like love.”“Flower just who have you and Lynda danced with over the last however many years?”“I joined Pretty Grim in spring 1986, I met Lynda at a pub dance out in summer ’86 when she used the Morris Mans Hat tradition to get talking to me, our first date was at a Grim practice a week later and. Is that all my father and I had meant to her all those years ago? Were we the puppies to her bitch? Sticking around a couple of years until I was off the bottle and could get around a bit and then splitting to a place where she didn't need to be responsible, to a place where love wasn't required?I don't remember any mommy-daughter moments. The only real memories I have of her are when she argued with my father, behind the closed bedroom door. I can still hear that raised voice yelling at him, insulting him. And there are plenty of pictures of me growing up but the only one with she and me is that one taken in the hospital.The woman next to my father today didn't look like the one in the pictures. She looked used up. I wondered how many men, how many bottles, how many pills and syringes she'd gone through since she wandered off to her better life?Twice I'd seen her across the street when I got to school. Sitting in that old beat up car, watching. How many other times had she been.
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